First off: 

There’s 19 new Fidget Pens in the shop and 7 new Bebes. Because so much of my artwork is still in the gallery, the artwork isn’t back in the shop just yet – but the folded cards ARE available, and so are a few prints.

A note about folded cards: they ship directly from my printing company to keep them more affordable. If I ordered them and then shipped them again when you ordered from me, I’d have to factor BOTH shipping charges into the price in the shop. As much as I like supporting the USPS, I’d rather keep my card prices more affordable. 

The solo show went very well, but I haven’t had time to process and parse the experience just yet. While it deserves that time and attention (and so do I) , as soon as the artwork was hanging on the walls of the gallery, I had to jump straight back into the workshop to make pens for the shop and The Orlando Pen show (and a commission for the Orlando Pen Club.)

(And off we go.)

I had told myself that, between the art show events, I’d turn as many pens as I could, and whatever I’d finished before uninstalling the artwork in the gallery, I’d list. Everything else would debut at the Orlando Pen Show on September 5th, and then go into the shop when we got back. That ended up being quite a few more pens than I thought I could get done. I’m most of the way through making about 70 pens – 16 of which are for the Orlando Pen Club, and 26 of which are finished and in the shop as of this writing. 

I want to tell you that I’ve learned things in juggling both art and pens to make going forward easier (and I have) and I want to tie the threads running through the past month together into some cohesive tapestry you can find meaning and hope in. I want to weave those threads from my life into something useful and beautiful for you, but the fact of the matter is that right now, I am a little on the threadbare side myself. I am feeling withdrawn and short on words, and frankly a little bitey, and mostly just want to hide from everything and cry until someone comes and saves me.

Only, I am the only person who’s gonna save me. I am the Ringmaster of this circus, and those are indeed my monkeys. I have to handle this. Right now, that means that the best thing I can do is to keep going. To keep doing the essentials, to keep being kind to myself when I don’t meet my own expectations, and maybe glare furiously at the wall with a heavy sigh once in a while – you know, as a treat.

I have to save myself, and so I will. It’s less like a princess though, and way more like an irritated dragon being bothered by delusional knights looking for a princess that doesn’t exist. I guess that makes me something of a Pen Dragon, doesn’t it? (Fitting, considering the Camelot-themed pens in the shop right now.) 

Terrible puns managed, I am going to get back to finishing that commission and making the last few pens for next month. By last few, I’m referring to about 40 pens waiting on the benches. I know damn well that I probably won’t finish them all before the Orlando Pen Show, but I have to start in order to get them finished – even if I don’t yet think about what it will take to finish. Just start.

May your heavy sighs this week be the kind that don’t require calling the fire department. 

– A. Markov